The Demonweasel Speaks

So, it never ends, huh? One of the things I hate the most about how I write is that I just keep coming up with ideas, and in running around trying to track them all down, I achieve as much as a dog chasing his tail. Or is it his tale?

Nyuck, nyuck, nyuck, nyuck.

I was at the bar last night, in the midst of tremendous weather and storms and such, watching basketball when an idea I’d been kicking around a while came a’knockin and I found myself asking for a pen and was scribbling ideas down in my trusty little notebook. Of course, I had to retranslate them this afternoon into things more legible, but I think I’ve got something going on. I had originally planned on doing this thing as a screenplay, but after some thought, I think graphic novel is more appropriate. I’m trying not to think about the problems inherent with doing a graphic novel (chief of which being “no artist”), and instead focusing on the work.

Of course, there’s the problem. Stop everything I’m doing and focus on this instead? I suppose any writing is worthwhile, but what happens when I jump to something else, and then something, and then something else. I guess the best way would be to just put this thing to bed.

We’ll see how that goes…

Jotting down nonsense, I remain…

So I’ve got my blood up and I don’t know what to do with myself.

Not in a bad, violent way, mind you, just that pacing the cage, looking to tear-ass across the country-side just to feel the wind on my face and the night air in my lungs. That’s not going to happen, I fear, so I think once I pound this out I’m going to do some writing. You know, that thing that I do.

I need to switch to decaf tea, which sucks. Less caffeine? Where has my head gone?

With a bang, not a whimper, the last episode of “Angel” was on Wednesday. I can’t believe they went with the Butch & Sundance ending (going out in a blaze of glory against impossible odds). I guess there isn’t any other way they could have done it, but still… It’s the way I’d want to go, I think, if one can choose a heroic death (as opposed to having one thrust upon you, which is almost always the case).

“Smallville” was good too, if you can call an ending where everyone is either dead, missing or in jail good. A theory I’ve seen bandied about is that, in order to stave off lengthy contract renegotiations for season 4, they leave everyone in a situation where they go “You don’t want what we’re offering? Fine, your character stays dead/missing/on vacation/in jail.” Kind of dirty pool if you ask me, but hey, I guess that’s life in the big city (or small Kansas farm town).

It looks like I’ll be going to a sci-fi convention in Columbus this coming weekend (Marcon), which will be my first convention experience. I’ll be working, but I think there will be some time for looking around and such. Should be interesting, if only for stories and such.

I have too many ideas. I need to either get more time that I actually use to write, or…well, just fucking do it, I guess. There really aren’t any other options. It’s just deciding what I’m going to work on which can be the problem. It should be the book, but I don’t want to loose the new ideas for short stories and the like that are coming out. Decisions, decisions.

In happier news, everyone wish my mother congratulations, as she graduated from college on Friday. I loves ya ma!

Barking at the moon, I remain…

A little vacation time, a little time to recharge the batteries and think about things that needed thought about.

That’s a fancy way for saying I haven’t really had anything to say.

I’m in the process of trying to change up my schedule and lifestyle. I think I’m slowly morphing myself into a more physically healthy person. Changing my diet, drinking less caffeine, that sort of stuff. I think it’s ridiculous that I set my alarm for 8:30, ride the snooze bar until 9:15 or 9:30, leap into the shower then get dressed and rush to be at work by 10:00. That’s lame. So, I’ve been pushing to get up earlier and do things. I’ve gone for a couple of early morning bike rides, done some of the important business that I need to do that often slips through the cracks. It’s important because when I start working at DS, I probably won’t be going in until noon or so, and there’s no reason to waste those mornings. I’ve been going to the gym on Tuesdays and Fridays and then doing freeweights stuff at home on Sunday nights (usually watching Sopranos, Deadwood and Six Feet Under). I’m looking into taking up Yoga and Boxing, too.

Maybe I am trying to be one of those “super soldier” guys. Going diesel, as some may say. Of course, with me it’s more like “going unleaded.” But gas prices are high, so maybe that means more.

The only thing missing in the equation is writing. I feel more positive and energized about it than ever…I’m just not doing it. I think I have to push back some of those morning hours and try to be doing it then. I guess the perfect day would be getting up, having breakfast and watching Sportscenter, working out, writing, then going to work. All that can be done in the times between waking up and noon, right? There should be. It’s been a bit of a rough adjustment as I get tired during the day more and find myself having to take naps some nights when I get home, and then ending up staying up until 1 or 2 still.

It’s kind of funny that I’m just now working towards doing the things that people had told me I had needed to do in my life years ago. I guess I just hate being told what to do.

What I love, though, are thunderstorms. We’ve had two of them in the past two days, the really rip-roaring midwest kind, where the thunder sounds like the sky is ripping itself apart and the lighting is so bright it’s like daylight. I love that feeling in there, like indescribable power surging through the atmosphere, and if you could just reach out and grab it, harness it, you could bend the heavens to your will.

Is that bad? Are those the seeds of delusional megalomania? Who knows.

I’ve been on-again/off-again with basketball. I was at the bar watching the NJ triple-overtime win over Detroit, surrounded mostly by Detroit fans. It was fun, though. I hung out and had great bar conversations with guys talking about guy things. I hadn’t been there in ages (technically it’s a new bar, as the old one has been made uninhabitable), and it’s nice to feel that atmosphere again, and to do it in a healthy way. I’m shocked that the Lakers one, and the way Miami is playing it doesn’t look like the Pacers will make it either. But hey, that’s why I love this game. I’m still irritated by the article on Fark that said Nascar has better ratings than basketball. How fucking lame is that?

So yeah, everything is changing, and I hope it’s for the better. Time only knows.

Whistling “there goes the bride”, I remain…

I was flipping around HBO the other day and I cam upon the Masters of the Universe movie. Y’know, He-Man. Dunno why they didn’t call it He-Man, but still, it was the hotness when I was a kid. A stupid, stupid kid. Anyway, it was on, and I watched the first 15 minutes of it and realized that the young teenage girl is Courtney Cox. Then I saw that her teenaged love interest was Robert Duncan McNeil, aka Lieutenant Paris from Star Trek: Voyager. And then they had their schmaltzy love talk in a van…while listening to the song “I’m livin’ in a box, I’m livin’ in a cardboard box.” That’s the definition of ridiculous: Courtney Cox and Lt. Paris sitting in a van have a deep conversation while listening to “I’m livin in a box” in the He-Man movie.

I’m on vacation now. Sure, I had to work at Dark Star today, but now, I’m on vacation. For real. I can stay up late without undue consequence, although I’ve stupidly put tons of pressure on myself for things to do during this week. We’ll see if more than half of them get done.

But I’m an optimist. Honest.

Also in my flipping around, I saw the first half of “Carrie 2: The Rage,” on USA. I think it’s bold to subtitle a movie with the emotion people have after wasting even a minute of their time watching it. But I respect boldness.

I’ve been pimping myself out on Friendster lately. Not only that, but thanks to my particular brand of psychosis I’ve been looking up all manner of folks from high school, be they friends, crushes, acquaintances and enemies. It’s funny to see who’s still out there. I must have ten year reunion on the back-brain-burner. But there I am, add me if you’re on it, and if you aren’t, get on there and then add me. Because we could all use more friends.

Should I stay up until 2:15 watching Roger Corman’s Frankenstein Unbound? It seems like a dreadful way to start my vacation, but hey, dreadful has its place.

Tattoo has healed nicely. Pictures maybe one day. One of my vacation agenda items is futzing around with this page, so we’ll see what comes of it. I’m tired of having a splash page at the main address, so I may try to not destroy everything and fix that. We shall see.

Yesterday was splendidly gorgeous, and I went for a six mile bike ride. It was nice to get out in the sun, riding at a nice pace along the bike trail. It’s mostly wooded at the edges, but every now and again you get a peek into the surrounding farmland, flat as Ohio gets. Off in the distance there are the highways, running parallel, but much faster, to you. That’s fine, though. Some people take the highway, some people take the bike trail. Some people get there faster, some people take longer. The important thing is to go at your own pace, the pace that you want to sent, and not one that’s set for you. Enjoy the ride, feel the sun, take care of yourself, and try to keep the bugs out of your teeth.

I don’t know what I’m talking about, but I remain…